You know what's not even remotely as fun as dancing with a Nile Special in your hand? Sober dancing. I mean, I'm less confident, people look a lot less attractive, I remember where the bathroom is located... or maybe that last point is a good thing. But the creators of Peace Corps Biggest Loser really should have listed those first two side effects on the waver.
There are 13 of us in the competition; 13 trash-talking, self-depriving, soon-to-be skinny Peace Corps Volunteers. I'm at least fulfilling the first part of that desciption. I'm really hoping to skip over the whole self-deprivation thing and go right to the skinny, especially since discovering a deliciously unavoidable snack called Roasty Tasty. We'll see. I've been stuck in Kampala for a few days and saw a book at Aerostock (the ghetto Barnes & Nobles of Uganda without the annoying Jewel CD on repeat) entitiled How to do Anything Without Working Hard...sounds great to me! My current plan is to just buy that book and set it on my bedside table for the duration of the competition, 6 months. Maybe I'll even read it. Before you doubt my seriousness in this competition I should say I did make an effort to pause at Aeorstock's exercise section but after flipping through an 80s exercise book and rediscovering the hilarity of spandex I saw a book called 40,001 baby names that called to me. It turns out my name is not listed in the Playful Girl Names section. I'm interpreting that to mean I was destined from the start to be lazyish and plump. But apparently if I'd been named Rabbit or Viveca I'd be playful as hell!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
fingerprint memories and hoodwinking sim sim
The generous Oreo giver from a previous entry is really becoming the best kind of nuisance to my rapidly expanding and evidently endlessly fun-to-poke waistline. The proof is not just on the scale but in the fingerprints- the greasy, wonderful fingerprint memories of the dare-I-say beautiful m&m ready-bake cookies, the tiny fingerprint reminders that now accent my otherwise dusty, formerly fat-free laptop. I could write a poem about those cookies. But I won’t. I’ll simply say, Thank you generous Oreo giver, I now rename you IwillprobablyblameyouwhenIhit60kilos.
In other food news I was slightly embarrassed and thoroughly surprised to find out my new favorite ingredient, lentils, are not lentils at all but sim sim (sesame seeds) in disguise! A recently departed Peace Corps Volunteer (not dead or anything…just finished with her service) gave me a bunch of her belongings and among said belongings was a large container labeled LENTILS. Well, far be it from me to doubt such a well-written, thoughtfully placed albeit obviously ancient homemade label. I even remember thinking, huh, these lentil thingamajigs sure look a lot like sesame seeds. But since I’d heard lentils are full of protein and low in calories, I started eating them every day. You know what’s not full of protein or even remotely low in calories? Sim sim in masquerade.
It’s quickly becoming evident my blog has begun to revolve around food and episodes of gluttony but in all honesty food has become a central theme of my present reality. Not long ago I used to speed home from school (or what I used to think of as speeding until I came to Uganda), park illegally in a nearby bank parking lot, literally run into my apartment building and pop a corndog into the oven while I rushed to get ready for work. In exactly 18 minutes I’d have a stick of deep-fried perfection and be ready to run out the door, speed over to the hospital, clock-in late yet again and snack on graham crackers for the entirety of my shift. I might have even stopped at Burgerville on the way home if I felt like spending $7 on a turkeyburger and fries.
Food used to be convenient. Corndogs came in 36 packs. Spinach came triple-washed and ready to eat. Lunchmeat came pre-sliced and in a variety pack to suite my every mood. Yes, I am feeling very honey-baked today! Thank you Oscar Mayer. And might I add your new resealable packaging is ingenious and makes my day all the more enjoyable and uncomplicated.
Yes, food used to be processed and pretty and eating used to be something I squeezed in between (or overlapped with) more important tasks except on special occasions. But recently eating has become my special occasion. It’s one of the major things I look forward to in my day. I wake up thinking about breakfast, I spend my morning thinking about lunch, I spend lunch prepping food for dinner. Come to think of it I should probably be tested for a parasite. But for now my yet-to-be diagnosed parasite and I are attempting to live in harmony with food the way it’s supposed to be; that is, fresh, misshapen, un-genetically altered food that’s more ready-rot than ready-bake.
In other food news I was slightly embarrassed and thoroughly surprised to find out my new favorite ingredient, lentils, are not lentils at all but sim sim (sesame seeds) in disguise! A recently departed Peace Corps Volunteer (not dead or anything…just finished with her service) gave me a bunch of her belongings and among said belongings was a large container labeled LENTILS. Well, far be it from me to doubt such a well-written, thoughtfully placed albeit obviously ancient homemade label. I even remember thinking, huh, these lentil thingamajigs sure look a lot like sesame seeds. But since I’d heard lentils are full of protein and low in calories, I started eating them every day. You know what’s not full of protein or even remotely low in calories? Sim sim in masquerade.
It’s quickly becoming evident my blog has begun to revolve around food and episodes of gluttony but in all honesty food has become a central theme of my present reality. Not long ago I used to speed home from school (or what I used to think of as speeding until I came to Uganda), park illegally in a nearby bank parking lot, literally run into my apartment building and pop a corndog into the oven while I rushed to get ready for work. In exactly 18 minutes I’d have a stick of deep-fried perfection and be ready to run out the door, speed over to the hospital, clock-in late yet again and snack on graham crackers for the entirety of my shift. I might have even stopped at Burgerville on the way home if I felt like spending $7 on a turkeyburger and fries.
Food used to be convenient. Corndogs came in 36 packs. Spinach came triple-washed and ready to eat. Lunchmeat came pre-sliced and in a variety pack to suite my every mood. Yes, I am feeling very honey-baked today! Thank you Oscar Mayer. And might I add your new resealable packaging is ingenious and makes my day all the more enjoyable and uncomplicated.
Yes, food used to be processed and pretty and eating used to be something I squeezed in between (or overlapped with) more important tasks except on special occasions. But recently eating has become my special occasion. It’s one of the major things I look forward to in my day. I wake up thinking about breakfast, I spend my morning thinking about lunch, I spend lunch prepping food for dinner. Come to think of it I should probably be tested for a parasite. But for now my yet-to-be diagnosed parasite and I are attempting to live in harmony with food the way it’s supposed to be; that is, fresh, misshapen, un-genetically altered food that’s more ready-rot than ready-bake.
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